"Haiyer Travis you think you so attractive meh people bo dai bo ji go molest you?"
Apparently they are!
Who would have thought I'd suay suay be molested right? I tell some people they still go and laugh lor!!! And I think chances are you're laughing about it also.
Anyway, it was flag day today so I was waiting for the train at the Boon Lay platform.
I was facing the tracks leaning against the railing. There was ample space between me and the other people in front. Even if there wasn't space, many people managed to walk past me without making any contact with me.
Then there came this man that looked like he was in his late 20s who was relatively slim and I was thinking that he should be able to walk past without making any contact with me. WRONG!
He decided to be very funny and brushed his stupid hand all the way from my left thigh to my crotch then my right thigh!
PUI CHAO NUA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cannot be not enough space for the hand to put somewhere else okay! And it wasn't like an accidental brush or anything it was INTENTIONAL. I know because he did it with a bit of pressure on my you-know-what.
I should have sworn at him right there and then but I was alone so I didn't want to embarrass myself in public and I was also too shocked to do anything. All I did was to open my eyes wide open in shock.
So yea. I'VE BEEN MOLESTED!!!!!!!!!!!!
But on the positive side, at least there are some people that find me attractive, yea yea? ;) ;) ;)
Anyway I also had a reunion dinner with my paternal relatives today.
The food was good but I also realized how far I've drifted from the family.
Like, I'm not even updated with family news and whatnot. When they talk about something that happened recently, I get completely lost.
My cousin was going to Thailand today and I didn't know about it until I heard them talking about it today. It felt really odd and awkward because all I could do was just sit there and listen.
I don't know what goes on in the family at all. To make things worse I am the only one left out all the time. Fact!
Not to mention my grandmother keeps pressing me to learn Cantonese!!!
Everyone keeps saying how shit my Cantonese is. The thing is, it is not.
I will admit that I only have a basic grasp of the language, but just because I look like I don't know what my grandmother is saying doesn't mean I don't understand what she's saying.
My grandmother was saying how she's old and can't eat a lot anymore but we young people can. What else is there to reply? I just kept quiet.
Then they just said "Hoi mm sek teng la!" (He don't understand la!) You sure or not?
Not hanging out with my paternal family =/= my Cantonese is shit.
In fact I think I'd be worse now if not for my interaction with Eva's family because they are also Cantonese.
But the really odd thing is how I can get along really well with Eva's family in Cantonese, but I just can't do the same for mine. It's so weird! Like, the Cantonese they speak is just SO CHEEM!
Well, point is, I don't know what else I can do with this family anymore.
It's always the same cycle every year - visit them during Chinese New Year and maybe occasional family events that I'd bother to go, always ending up as an awkward affair for me.
I really want to spend more time with them but the thing is I AM LAZY. It's truly something I can't help.
Aunt will just talk about education all the time, don't even understand 80% of what my grandmother says, will be asked to lose my virginity by other cousins, what else is there?
I'm also not close with all my cousin's kids. I am like a monster to them I'm not even joking. I want to spend time with them too :(
When I'm with my friends I am that happy, jumpy person that says a lot of bullshit. But with my family it's totally different. It's just awkward silence because I don't know what I can say, and just today my uncle asked, "Why do you look so dreamy everyday?"
My uncle blames me not visiting them on the fact that I "play" the internet everyday when I don't even play games anymore.
And sometimes my grandmother would invite my sister to drink soup at her place and tell her to bring me along but my sister always tells me on the day itself. And most of the time I would have already decided how to spend my day.
Then my aunt also encouraged me to go to her place more often to drink her soups. I'd love to but I really do not have the time to travel to and fro. Bus rides are excruciating. Besides, I doubt she actually makes soup everyday.
How leh you tell me? Then now there's some ~new people~ in the family whom I do not like to the extent where I can't even believe that I am associated with them.
I think my bond with the family has reached an unrepairable state. It's sad especially when I don't even know what I can do about it; there's really nothing.