Fat person rummaging through trash = priceless

I just came back from watching Spy Kids 4 which, by the way, is pretty decent for a family film. We were also given these... aroma scopes?



That supposedly has certain fragrances when the number flashes on the screen but most of the smells all smelt like car scents mostly because I wasn't doing it properly, except for one that was supposed to smell like shit but ended up being chocolate.

The smell fades away really quickly so you have to rub it near your nose while smelling it so you look like you're snorting cocaine but not really.


Anyway, when the movie ended and I was on my way out, I checked my pockets (because it's a habit I have) and I realised my handphone was not in my pocket. So while everyone was crowding the middle aisle on their way out, I had to squeeze my way through the crowd just to get back to my seat and check if my phone was there.

I was fucking panicking okay so my first instinct was that it was on the floor, but it wasn't. Not just that, but I also found out that all along I had been sitting below a pile of spilt muruku which definitely did not help the situation.

I even checked the floors of the rows infront and behind mine as if my phone was able to ninja mode all the way there and then I gave up. PEOPLE PANICKING RIGHT?

And then Edrie said...


 "Could it be in the trash bag?"
JENG JENEJGEJGNEJGNEGJEG!


I immediately exclaimed "OH MY FUCKING GOD!" to the whole damn theater which only had Shiela, Edrie and the GV staff cleaning up the trash. (more on the asshole later)


Edrie was repeatedly calling my phone so I felt the outside of the trash bag for any signs of my phone being there.

I FELT VIBRATIONS.

So I did what I had to do.

I SEARCHED THE TRASH BAG WHICH WAS HALF FULL OF JUNK.

LIIIIKKKEEEE AAAAA BEEEEGGGGGAAAAAARRRRRR


AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

 It was okay at first, and then I started touching the remnants of everybody's nacho cheese and soft drinks and even then, I was still undeterred from finding my phone. HELLO IT'S MY PHONE AND IT'S NOT LOST, IT'S THERE!

In the end Shiela was like "AIYA THE VIBRATION IS FROM THE SOUND LA THE MUSIC STILL PLAYING RIGHT" and she had a point, because by then I was already emptying articles one by one to see if it was there and it wasn't. Also, the vibrations were not there anymore even though Edrie was still calling my phone.


As it turns out, it was chillaxing like a boss in between 2 seats; mine and Shiela's whom was sitting beside me during the movie.


WHAT AN ANTI-CLIMAX.

JUDGE ME ALL YOU WANT I WAS PANICKING OKAY I DIDN'T THINK OF THE SEAT!!!!!


Enough about me, now I want to complain about the Golden Village staff.

At first, he was standing there at the exit in the theater (you should know) where he's holding up the trash bag for people to throw their shit in. (This can also be a personal recount of what goes on after you leave so you don't have to experience it yourself)

Afterwards, he would carry the bag up and place it somewhere while he would go around the theatre picking up the rubbish left by inconsiderate people.

Initially, I thought he would AT LEAST ask what the fuck I was doing kneeling doggy style unintentionally giving off penetration signals but no, he didn't utter a word! I thought he would at least assist me in searching for my cheebye phone, but no!

And when I had that epiphany that it could be in the trash bag, I stood up, turned around, stared at him right in his face which was staring back at me, and I screamed "OH MY GOD I THINK IT'S IN THE BAG!" and he just continued staring at me, blankly, like some deaf person AND I DOUBT HE WAS REALLY DEAF LA OKAY.

He didn't even AT LEAST give the green light for me to rummage through the trash bag, or offer some help, though even if I were a staff member I wouldn't stick my hand into the trash bag full of crap la.

And then even after I got back my phone and we were making our way down, Edrie took the effort to even apologize for what happened TWICE, and he didn't say a fucking thing.

CHAO CHEEBYE WHY YOU SO LIKE THAT? WHAT KIND OF SERVICE IS THIS GOLDEN VILLAGE? HUH HUH? I'M REALLY ANGRY NOW BECAUSE I KNOW IT WAS MY FAULT I KNOW I SHOULDN'T HAVE WORN PANTS WITH LOOSE POCKETS BUT STILL IT IS PART OF YOUR SERVICE TO ASSIST IF WE LOSE ANYTHING OKAY?

I DON'T FUCKING CARE IF YOU'RE SOME UNEDUCATED FUCKER WHO HATES HIS JOB BUT IF YOU ARE GOING TO WORK IN THE SERVICE SECTOR, YOU FUCKING DO YOUR JOB LIKE YOU SHOULD, OR ALL YOU'LL BE DOING IS PICK UP RUBBISH OFF THE FLOOR FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!!!!!


I am going to write in to GV to complain. So yes, now I feel like a piece of shit who touched junk and I feel like a motherfucking loser. Omg and I was wearing the school's PE T-Shirt! I'm so sorry Mr Gan for ruining the school's reputation, but desperate times call for desperate measures, i.e. searching through a trashbag like a G6.

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