Life is but a dream

Hello everybody it is me again, the gift that the lord from up above has generously bestowed upon you peasants. I forgot to blog about ANOTHER DREAM I HAD last week which should have been true because it involved food.

The dream started off with me finding out that ayumi hamasaki was finally going to have a concert in Singapore. Hooray! Immediately bought the $288 tickets with Jiarong.

On the day of the concert, apparently the concert was going to be held in a cinema-like venue and we were rudely greeted by the revelation that we were going to be seated at the second last row of the cinema!

Not only that, but apparently my maid who took care of me when I was younger AND my 93-year-old grandmother were there WTF! And the front rows were totally empty!

That wasn't even the end to this shittastic escapade. Before the show started, we found out that with every costume change we will have to PAY AS WE WATCH. What blasphemy! They even had a price guide stuck to the door which went something like:

FIRST ACT | $5 + PEN
SECOND ACT | $5 + PEN
THIRD ACT | $15 + PEN
ENCORE | $15 + PEN

Basically, if you don't pay, they will throw you out of the venue. And yes, we had to legit pass them money AND a real PEN. Not a PENis, but a pen that we all use to write. Needless to say I got kicked out after the first act, but I went to draw money and came back. When I announced my decision to continue paying throughout the concert Jiarong was like "Huh you really gonna pay ah" and I texted Sibyl about it and she was like "Huh really ah"

Everything was hazy after that...




and then it was clear again. I was suddenly sitting amongst the first few rows with Jiarong and a few other people who I was familiar with (dunno exactly but we seemed quite close) occupying that area. I also happen to be eating this during the concert:





Which made me crave for it like shit for the following days ahead. WHAT IS ITS LEGIT NAME EVEN CALLED? DOES IT EVEN HAVE A NAME?

I know they will serve it with bee hoon but what the hell is this shit? And more importantly, WHAT EXACTLY IS THAT RED SAUSAGE-LIKE THING MADE OF? #singaporemysteries but that's another story for another day

Not only was I eating it, but Tay Ping Hui came over to steal some from me. Bloody bastard.

The last memory from that dream was the highlight of the dream itself, other than the mystery food thing, ayumi hamasaki. She just finished a performance of Fly high while sitting on a chair (whether you know the song or not is not important!!) and proceeded to dramatically fall from her chair and start dramatically fake crying.

Usually the audience would be like wow love it flawless etc. etc. but this time everyone including me LAUGHED LOL!!!! WE WERE LIKE "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" IT WAS HILAAAAAARIOUS but yea that was it. I still don't know how I got so many pens to make payment for but oh well, IT'S ALL A DREAM.


Meanwhile back to reality my second penis/uvula has significantly shrunken but not quite to its original size yet so it's still quite annoying. The operated area doesn't look as disgusting as I thought it'd be. It's so funny how no matter how gross your injury looks, Google always reassures you that people have had it worse. Like if you think you have a small penis Google will show you everything about micropenises. That's why they say Google is our best friend awwwwwww but yea bye

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