THROWBACK SATURDAY

If you've ever missed how I look with my short hair or wondered how I'd even look like with short hair, check this shizz out



Apparently people say I look good if I have short hair in this style (there's a ponytail tied at the back so I'm serving some yakuza realness) but I have to use like fucking styling lotion then hair gel then more hair wax like I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THAT (plus it involves a comb hello???)

The reason why I'm sporting this shittastic back comb is because that's gonna be my look for the upcoming freshman bonding camp HO HO HO SO EXCITING and I won't reveal my full outfit yet but let's just say it's a whooooole lotta nipples. A whoooooole lotta nipples.

Trial camp was also just over which amazed me once again at how terrible my stamina is again. My group was literally going like WE GONNA WIN THIS SHIT but after 10 seconds we just fucked everything. Didn't help matters that we were all wet and dirty and Cheryl Fox decided to conveniently show up at the FMS courtyard oh god

I was helping Mr William out when we were folding the welcome letters and putting them into envelopes for the upcoming freshies. Of course being the kaypoh that I am I saw all the addresses and there's a lot of people who live in Pasir Ris, Simei, and everywhere else in the east. Wtf!

And apparently two freshmen literally live in the blocks right next to mine. One on each side. Creepehhhh


As you can see my life is SERIOUSLY REVOLVING AROUND CAMP but NOOOOOOO. Cherish the picture above while you can, my friends, for something will never be the same again - the wall behind.

I am currently halfway through painting my entire wall after 5 years because I made a really stupid decision to draw pencil marks to estimate where my posters used to be and now that I've taken a few down I also had to face the shocking revelation of a once-long-forgotten HOLE in my wall.

So now the hole is all patched up and initially I wanted to repaint it the exact same colour because all I wanted was to cover up the pencil marks and the hole which were not obstructed by any posters or what. Also because I'm damn lazy to take down the rest of the posters on my wall. I even took the trouble to find the bloody nippon paint colour catalogue and found the exact colour!!!

But NOOOOO the colour somehow just wasn't the same so I was just like aiya fuck everything and decided to get an entirely new colour. My new wall colour is called ~*Knockout Red*~ which is simply a rather dark red so I love it. I don't even know why my wall was pink in the first place.

So yep I hope you guys aren't bored by my life yet. I'll buy for you all Kit Kat.

Boom boom boom boom I want you in my room

So sorry for the lack of updates. As a form of compensation I shall share with y'all with my latest jam



♫ Of all the juices I've ever swallowed, you're the purest, the purest of the bunch! ♫

No sexual innuendos intended at all! It's so terrible yet it's stuck in my head

Nonetheless I've been REALLY busy with the planning and organising for the upcoming freshman bonding camp. This past week I've been in school from Monday - Thursday! I'm so dedicated that it's shocking even to myself. Vanessa and I are crazy. But Vanessa is crazier because my work ethic will never be as hiong as hers hahaha.

Anyway my tribe's progress is going extremely well so I'm very thankful for having this bunch of SLs! I'm not going to reveal much in case any freshies happen to chance upon this blog (yea right) but if any of you read this CAMP IS GONNA BE AWESOME especially if you're gonna be in my tribe because I am biased like that.

Speaking of progresses I'm also learning my ukulele at very good progress as well. I can play my first song now! Which is Lana Del Rey's Ride because that song only has like, 5 chords. But it's still good progress k! I'm still having trouble changing chords quickly yet making them sound clear and sharp because I keep forgetting that I actually have to press down REALLY hard and doing so HURTS LIKE A BITCH LA wa biang woi

Other than that nothing's really been happening in my life other than camp camp camp camp camp. Maybe I'll update some time again this week so yea bye!


I am a marketing extraordinaire

If you represent the marketing department of 313 @ Somerset, you're gonna want to read this shit.

The productivity in late night conversations has resulted in the perfect marketing plan for y'all man. All you guys need to do is to advertise / publicise / whatever shit that at 3:13AM at 313, ALL items will be on sale for only $3.13!!! If you're kiam siap, a 3.13% discount is fine too. Business is going to BOOM! It will be in the headlines. Tourists will all flock to queue up like it's Black Friday weekend everyday. How exciting is that?

How are you going to earn profit if you sell everything for $3.13, you may ask. The answer is simple.

ALL THE SHOPS ARE CLOSED AT 3.13AM ANYWAY!!!!

The items can be priced at $3.13 in the stores - that's what you advertised. But you didn't say you would be open!!!!

HOHOOHOHOHOOHOOH THIS IS GONNA PISS EVERYONE OFF SO. BAD.

Ok sorry as you can see I'm not in the right state of mind.

Also, Formspring is closing down. Boohoo. God dammit, my account isn't even one year old yet. Therefore I have moved my bullshitting to ask.fm so please shoot away because I am seriously bored.

Seriously.

CDs of the month! (#36)

HELLO EVERYBODY HEHEHEHEHEHE I wanted to post this up yesterday but my Internet decided to die on me so too bad. Has anyone else's stupid Singtel connection gotten shittier after they did some update?



(2013.02.08) ayumi hamasaki - LOVE again (CD+Blu-ray | Limited Edition)

The limited edition of Ayu's latest album. It's also my first ever blu-ray whut whuuuuuut even though I haven't watched it on my blu-ray player yet. The covers are so much better than her last one but I can't say the same for the album tracks though :(

Plus she's so lazy because her past 2 mini albums were titled "LOVE" and "again" so she decided to conveniently name the album LOVE again! And she included all the original songs on both mini-albums in this album as well oh wow lazy bitch




(CD Packaging | Album Review)


(2013.02.20) MISIA - Super Best Records -15th Celebration- (3CD+DVD | Limited Edition)

MISIA's 15th anniversary best album. I sure like them old bitches. The packaging is really sexy though and this is like her first #1 album in like 7 years

(CD Packaging)



(2013.02.27) Koda Kumi - Color the Cover (CD+DVD | Limited Edition)

Kuu's latest cover album that comes in a book-like packaging. And this cover album is like awesooooooome and I think it's much better than her first

(CD Packaging | Album Review)


(2013.03.06) Namie Amuro - Big Boys Cry / Beautiful

This bitch DOES NOT look 36 and can still release pussy popping hits after 20 years. I want to see Namie twerk the shit out of this song when she performs in Singapore next month (GUESS WHO GOT 4TH ROW TICKETS?)

The best part is that she's actually smiling in the music video. Faking a smile and SELLING IT!



(CD Packaging)

Day 10 Post-Op

...what a letdown.

I was expecting myself to be in full-on pain like a gym ball is coming out of my mouth and that I'll squirming on the bed, gasping for air in-between yelps of pain, suffering a slow, painful, death...

but actually maybe I really do have a high tolerance for pain. It still hurts a little bit but it feels very... like that lor. The pain is so minute that it's starting to become annoying! Like wtf GO HARD OR GO HOME!

I can even eat a whole bucket of KFC chicken now if I want to but at this point it's hard to believe that I might still have severe bleeding. ~*Life's mysteries*~

I've been practicing with my ukulele lately and wowowow I'm a musical prodigy! Loljk but I lavvit. I still strum very inconsistently (like really) mainly because I'm only using my fingers and shit hurts like a bitch (lol and I was just talking about how I can tahan pain) so I finally went to buy picks from eBay yesterday lmao.

Let's not even get started on playing the chords. How can people actually hold down the strings so hard for extended periods of time?! I can't even hold a chord involving 2 or more fingers for more than 5 seconds :'(

I'm even interested in learning the guitar now but Kin Leonn told me anything above $200 is fine and I'm like lol k bye ain't nobody got cash for that. There are secondhand ones online for less than $100 but they're like weird brands that probably aren't worth taking a risk. I think I'm really going to start selling my backside soon.

Life is but a dream

Hello everybody it is me again, the gift that the lord from up above has generously bestowed upon you peasants. I forgot to blog about ANOTHER DREAM I HAD last week which should have been true because it involved food.

The dream started off with me finding out that ayumi hamasaki was finally going to have a concert in Singapore. Hooray! Immediately bought the $288 tickets with Jiarong.

On the day of the concert, apparently the concert was going to be held in a cinema-like venue and we were rudely greeted by the revelation that we were going to be seated at the second last row of the cinema!

Not only that, but apparently my maid who took care of me when I was younger AND my 93-year-old grandmother were there WTF! And the front rows were totally empty!

That wasn't even the end to this shittastic escapade. Before the show started, we found out that with every costume change we will have to PAY AS WE WATCH. What blasphemy! They even had a price guide stuck to the door which went something like:

FIRST ACT | $5 + PEN
SECOND ACT | $5 + PEN
THIRD ACT | $15 + PEN
ENCORE | $15 + PEN

Basically, if you don't pay, they will throw you out of the venue. And yes, we had to legit pass them money AND a real PEN. Not a PENis, but a pen that we all use to write. Needless to say I got kicked out after the first act, but I went to draw money and came back. When I announced my decision to continue paying throughout the concert Jiarong was like "Huh you really gonna pay ah" and I texted Sibyl about it and she was like "Huh really ah"

Everything was hazy after that...




and then it was clear again. I was suddenly sitting amongst the first few rows with Jiarong and a few other people who I was familiar with (dunno exactly but we seemed quite close) occupying that area. I also happen to be eating this during the concert:





Which made me crave for it like shit for the following days ahead. WHAT IS ITS LEGIT NAME EVEN CALLED? DOES IT EVEN HAVE A NAME?

I know they will serve it with bee hoon but what the hell is this shit? And more importantly, WHAT EXACTLY IS THAT RED SAUSAGE-LIKE THING MADE OF? #singaporemysteries but that's another story for another day

Not only was I eating it, but Tay Ping Hui came over to steal some from me. Bloody bastard.

The last memory from that dream was the highlight of the dream itself, other than the mystery food thing, ayumi hamasaki. She just finished a performance of Fly high while sitting on a chair (whether you know the song or not is not important!!) and proceeded to dramatically fall from her chair and start dramatically fake crying.

Usually the audience would be like wow love it flawless etc. etc. but this time everyone including me LAUGHED LOL!!!! WE WERE LIKE "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA" IT WAS HILAAAAAARIOUS but yea that was it. I still don't know how I got so many pens to make payment for but oh well, IT'S ALL A DREAM.


Meanwhile back to reality my second penis/uvula has significantly shrunken but not quite to its original size yet so it's still quite annoying. The operated area doesn't look as disgusting as I thought it'd be. It's so funny how no matter how gross your injury looks, Google always reassures you that people have had it worse. Like if you think you have a small penis Google will show you everything about micropenises. That's why they say Google is our best friend awwwwwww but yea bye

I removed my balls.

So sorrayyyyyeee for the absence and as much as I wanted to update I have been playing Mahjong for the past 2 days and I can't stop losing my money.

I've never mentioned this here AS ALWAYS but I went for a surgery just last Thursday. That's right everybody. I underwent surgery to take out a brain tumour. NOOOOOOT.

The funny thing is how Nicolene successfully fooled Cheryl Koh, Kin Leonn and Kim about it (and Kim never knew the truth until after my surgery). Even before school ended we were so bored that Nicolene decided to lie to everyone that I fainted in school when in actual fact we were just chilling at OurSpace HAHAHAHAHA

But yea I think I've mentioned about how I first got tonsillitis like around 2010-ish? And since then I have been getting relapses maybe 2-3 times a year. I opted not to remove them then because few times a year only nevermind one la. Then lagi heng last year I had 3 relapses in 3 months so that was when I knew shit had to go down already.

The best part of this decision was when I found out that my HUGEASS TONSILS (literally every time I visit a doctor he'll confirm comment on my huuuuge tonsils) was actually the reason behind my hardcore snoring!

I never knew why because I visited a specialist who said that snoring is actually considered abnormal in young children and I even underwent a sleep study to see if I have sleep apnea. NOW EVERYONE WILL WANT TO SLEEP WITH ME!!! WAHAHAHAHA

I first went to this private clinic to get myself checked and they had to insert this tube w a camera on it UP MY NOSE ALL THE WAY TO HAVE A BIRD'S EYE VIEW OF MY THROAT which was damn uncomfortable and I was all tearing and shit.

Anyway I dunno why I told you all this so yea I had my surgery last Thursday to have them removed. Even dating back to weeks before the surgery I was already googling on other people's recovery experiences which were not pleasant at all (some people even compare the pain to CHILDBIRTH leh) so I was freaking out also.

Many also mentioned about how their voices changed (holy shitballs) and I was so scared that my Radio Heatwave career will come to a sudden end but end up never change la so yay

I wanted to instagram an ootd with my operation gown and all on that day but apparently because there were SGH logos printed all over it the doctor said I cannot lol

ANYWAY I WAS VERY PISSED WITH THE MALE NURSE!!! Ok so I was already lying on the operation table (wa really like grey's anatomy man I tell you) and while they were injecting the anesthetic into me the nurse was pressing an oxygen mask onto my face telling me to breathe in. Lovely. I took a deep breath. He said "very good".

THEN I TRIED TO BREATH OUT. BLOODY HELL he press until so hard I couldn't even breathe out!! PEKCEK but I fell asleep soon after so thank god

Of course when I woke up I felt like shit. I didn't feel like I was missing anything or whatever, but for some weird reason I couldn't stop tearing and my neck felt really uncomfortable probably because of the position I was in when they operated on me.

When my mum checked on me in the ward (did I mention she went off to watch Les Miserables while I was staring into space on a bed) I forgot I was still tearing and she told me not to cry and immediately assumed that I WAS IN PAIN so she went to call for a doctor despite me trying to gesture to her that I wasn't (I wasn't able to talk then) so when the doctor came I just told him to give me a piece of paper and I wrote "I'M NOT IN PAIN THE TEARS R JUST THERE" LOL

So far it hasn't been as painful as I thought it'd be when I swallow (mmm ;) ). It feels as though I have a bruise at the back of my neck, that's all. My uvula (the hanging thing in your mouth) is REALLY swollen though. Like it's so swollen that it's literally resting on my tongue right now. Almost like a second penis.

In my mouth. ;)

Anyway I'll like gag on it even if I bend down so that's annoying. You know what else I'll gag on while bending down. I would post a picture but I think you all will faster X the window

Edrie, Sabrina and Zocia came to visit me and they bought me a Tinkerbell balloon. They know just what I like!

It's already Monday technically and the pain is actually subsiding but I'm not holding my breath because the pain supposedly peaks when the scabs start to fall off around days 6-8 post-op. I can't even leave the house for one week because I might get an infection from like you or something. And I might still bleed to death. So technically my life is still hanging on a thread.

I'll update as the days go by since I'm so shit bored here so this can be like a journal like hey this is day 4 and I feel amazing!! If the pain worsens then it's good material for you to gloat about la but if it doesn't then too bad